New Positivity

I am kinda new to this positivity thing. My #1 positivity idol is my wife. The most posiitive person I know. I have also realized that if you watch positive things on television, you will be more apt to be more positive. My #1 positive talkshow is Ellen. She does more positive things on her show than anyone I know. From the dance in the begining, to hergive a ways, we could all learn a lot from her. We will

meet, but then again we have whenever the show airs.

1,1,11

If you are like most people, you are making resolutions.  By now 90% of people have broken the resolutions they made 24 hours earlier. If you do your best and fail, that is a good thing. Because you are moving forward. I am not making any resolutions. I know I need to lose weight. So I lose weight. I need to pass a p.t. test. I know it will be hard, but I need to do it. I need to learn to type so I can get a decent job. Zappos, the number one customer service entity in the world, is my dream job. I will do whatever I need to do to get there.

1-1-11 has alot in store for me. There will be times I do well, as well as times I fall on my face. I enjoy the times I fall down. It gives me the chance to get back up.

IMPRISONED

I feel imprisoned by my circumstances. I feel trapped. I feel like there is no way out. I have been out of the military service for almost 1 year. I have a daughter in Illinois who has no desire to have a relationship with her mother. I have another daughter who is holding a grudge against her mother. Yes their dad died 3 years ago, but it still hurts. What am I going to do when our government decides to cut unemployment. What am I going to do then when 2 unemployment check cover rent, and the other two cover bills.

How can I move to a cheaper place or state when I cannot save anything. I would move back to Illinois if I could afford it. I would move to Nevada if I could afford it. But circumstances are such that I am stuck where I am. I will just have to wait and see I guess. They say good things come to those who wait, well I have been waiting a long time. So by that rule, I must have something huge coming.

Reflections

Whenever you lose someone close to you, it makes you reflect. It makes you re-evaluate what is important. It is a reality check.

My brother, Matthew J West, died in Afghanistan while serving our wonderful country. The things Matt loved came in this order, his wife and children, his unit, his friends, and EOD. He loved hard, if you know what I mean. His love was so intense, it was inspiring. I could always count on him for a pick me up, when he himself probably needed the picking up.

With all the separation and divorce that was in our unit, he was a model husband. What happens in ____ stays in ____. He did not subscribe to that like others did.

I do not know how this humble blog will be used. But if just 1 person calls a friend, parent, brother, sister, daughter, son, who they do not have the relationship they should have, then it will be worth it. You might say, Gary are you practicing what you preach? The answer is a resounding YES!! I have had a really bad relationship with my mother for years. I am now calling her once a week. Before then, I had not told my mother I loved her in years. Next will be my sister Lynda, then Bill, then Laura, then the rest of my family.

You never know when the last time you speak with someone will be the last time. Do you want the last thing you say to a loved one to be negative? Do you want someone to die, and have to say to yourself, I wish I would have said _______. Is what you are arguing about so important you are willing to risk the rest of your life? Because that is exactly what you will be for the rest of your days is bitter if you have any animosity towards those who are supposed to be closest to. Not only that, your children will see it even when you think you are doing a good job at hiding it. Then they do it because mommy and daddy do it. Break the cycle. Do it with your children. Let them see that you value relationships more than opinion.

I will close with this. Turn off the computer, pick up the cell phone, and call someone who you need to fix your relationship with. It will impact the rest of your life. Today is the first day of the rest of your life. If I can do it, so can you. If you need help doing it, then message me, and I will work with you.

R.I.P Matthew J West

The memorial service for Staff Sergeant Matthew J. West will be held on September 22, 2010 at Murphy’s Funeral Home, 4510 Wilson Blvd, Arlington Virginia (703)920-4800.  The service will be conducted from 6-8pm.  In lieu of flowers, the family has requested donations be sent  to PO Box 5632, Colorado Springs, CO 80931 for an educational fund that is being established for their three children, Carolyn West as administrator.   A direct account has also been established at CHASE Bank, account # 893424697.   Cards and letters of support may be sent to this PO Box.

The funeral will be conducted at Arlington National Cemetery in Arlington Virginia on September 23, 2010 starting precisely at 1pm.  In order to attend, family and friends will need to drive to the main gate at Arlington and inform the security personnel they are arriving for the funeral.  The security personnel will direct the attendees to a specific location to gather  for the ceremony.  It is required that  all participants be at this designated position before  12:30pm  for the start of the service.   Please be aware there can be updates and changes to the service, including starting time, outside of the family’s control as this will be a full military funeral under their direction.

A gathering for family and friends will be held following the service, the time and place have not been determined.

It is recommended travel and hotel arrangements be made quickly as lodging space is very limited

Remembering

I was privileged to have known Matthew J West. He was part of 710th Explosive Ordnance Company at Joint Base Lewis McChord. He left for the 62nd EOD at fort Carson. He deployed to Afghanistan. He was in a vehicle that was hit by an IED on the 30th of August 2010.

The memorial service for Staff Sergeant Matthew J. West will be held on September 22, 2010 at Murphy’s Funeral Home, 4510 Wilson Blvd, Arlington Virginia (703)920-4800.  The service will be conducted from 6-8pm.  In lieu of flowers, the family has requested donations be sent  to PO Box 5632, Colorado Springs, CO 80931 for an educational fund that is being established for their three children, Carolyn West as administrator.   A direct account has also been established at CHASE Bank, account # 893424697.   Cards and letters of support may be sent to this PO Box.

The funeral will be conducted at Arlington National Cemetery in Arlington Virginia on September 23, 2010 starting precisely at 1pm.  In order to attend, family and friends will need to drive to the main gate at Arlington and inform the security personnel they are arriving for the funeral.  The security personnel will direct the attendees to a specific location to gather  for the ceremony.  It is required that  all participants be at this designated position before  12:30pm  for the start of the service.

Please be aware there can be updates and changes to the service, including starting time, outside of the family’s control as this will be a full military funeral under their direction. A gathering for family and friends will be held following the service, the time and place have not been determined. It is recommended travel and hotel arrangements be made quickly as lodging space is very limited.

I would request if you know me at all, to send something. It’s a way we can show someone who is not expecting anything a random act of wowness.

From Despair To Delight

A wise person said once that you should turn the bad in your life to good. On August 30th, 2010 Matthew J West died in Afghanistan. He was an EOD team leader with the 62nd EOD company in Fort Carson, Colorado. He was like a brother to me. I will miss him dearly.

A mentor of mine, who lost someone who was like a mother to her, suggested I start a chat connected to my blog for those who need to talk about their loss. In doing so, will help me. I am researching it so I can do just that. Stay tuned to see how I turn my despair into delight.

Children

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Someone once told me that no children would go bad if they knew one person cared for them. Why do we use the term “Go Bad”? All children want to know their parents love and care for them. The term “Go Bad” is nothing more than them saying” I have something to say. Listen to me. Pay attention to me.”

As a parent, we have a few jobs. 1. Feed your children, 2. clothe your children, 3. care for your children. Every parent knows these three. But it is sad to say it is all they do. Your children want most to be heard. They speak in all different sorts of ways. The verbal is easy to pick up on. It’s the non-verbal that the majority of parents miss. If they printed a code book like we had in the Army, that would be good.

Let’s all take the time to listen to our children. The more we listen, the more we are listened to. But that’s life in general.

Have a great day!!

Delivering Happiness

This man is so inspirational to me. Tony Hsieh of Zappos.  If we could touch one life like he has, the world would be a better place.

Imagine if you are a struggling parent, just bombarded by life, and you are in line at the grocery store. When you get your few things up on the belt, the person behind you, who you never saw, pays for your stuff, and adds some of their stuff. You thank him profusely and gather your things in a different frame of mind. You are pulling out of the lot, you have the right of way, but you let someone who looks like they’re in a hurry turn first. You notice a smile on his once frowned face. He pulls in the same lot you just came out of. Two weeks later you see the same person bagging groceries. You purposely wait to go through his line. He recognizes you and thanks you again. He tells you he was almost late because his three month old baby was sick.

If everyone who watches the Happy Hour(I wish it was on every Friday), reads Delivering Happiness, or reads this humble blog started their own chain reaction, we would be much happier. Please go see the Delivering Happiness Bus Tour(http://www.deliveringhappinessbus.com) when it is close to you. Follow it on Facebook(http://www.facebook.com/deliveringhappiness) and Twitter(http://twitter.com/dhbus). If you do not have the book yet, You can get it here(http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0446563048?ie=UTF8&tag=deliveringhappiness-website-20).

Let’s all start a chain!!

Gary

You never know

You never know how something will affect you. A friend of mine, Kris Sperry, went to heaven with 2 co-workers as the result of a house fire. I had not seen Kris in years. Never knew he graduated from Washington State Patrol Academy with the physical fitness award. But when I heard he died, it hit me really hard. I could not understand why it affected me to the degree it did. I had not seen him in years. So why such a profound affect? When you are friends, you are friends for life. He was a kind, gentle physical fitness monster. We were all sore for days after when he was in charge. When we played frisbee football, he was like the Walter Payton of frisbee football he was so good. I will miss him.

Hello world!

This is my inaugural blog here on WordPress. The knowledge I can impart is this, patience and caring. Now what do you mean Gary? I am a jobless vet with a mountain of bills to pay. I get rejected by the employers I apply to. Son has ADHD. Wife has suspicious moles. Food running out. This is a breeding ground for impatience. I know that someday something will come. God Will Provide.

While we are waiting, we need to love and care for those around us. I believe in what goes around comes around. The bible puts it as “you reap what you sow.” We all go to the grocery store. This is the easiest place to help or care for someone. Offer to help someone find something. At the very least, smile and say hello. You will never know the far reaching effects a simple greeting will have on someone.

I hope to grow with all who kindly read my humble blog, and offer advice on how we can work as a team to help others with it. Be kind to others, because everyone is going through a tough time.

Your friend

Gary